Meditation.
I shall read the 22 Chapter of St. Mathew’s Gospel.
The life has internal side except the external one, inaccessible to people. The people try to guess only from the closed book. The people are full with desires, but they do not understand the inner content of these desires. For example, not a few would like to go somewhere without knowing why. If I make you to choose a place, you will not know which one namely to choose. You want to be a king without knowing why. According to some people, the best thing is to be a king, but why, what you will achieve by this, you do not know. It is important for you that as a king whatever you want will be fulfilled. I am asking. What will be your position, if you are kings but nobody obeys you? The wish of people to marry hides in it, just the same idea, to become kings and queens and to have nationals – children, who to obey them. — That is it, but what will say those kings and queens if their nationals do not obey them? However, the children revolt against their parents; they do not want to obey them, and they want to become kings and queens as well. The sons and daughters fight against their parents; they want to set free from their guardianship.
I am asking: What happens with the king after his death? — He was buried, a tombstone was put saying that he was a king. Also, the father and mother leave tombstones after them. At the end, one is satisfied with the fact that he was a good student, finished school, worked something. — This is good, but when he enters the other world, the things are taking another turn: the first become last, and the last – first. Everybody wonder how it happens that the clever pupils become last ones. Really, you could not imagine this fact. The world gives us the following explanation. Do you think that by praying three times a day without following the God’s will you will be the first pupils? Who believes in your God? You are a banker, who jingles money for days and you say: Do not speak to me about God. I believe in the money. The cook clatters the lids of cooking pots, opens them, closes them and says: There is, what I believe in. There is no other God for me. You want him to have you a bite, but he told you: I do not give anything without money. How you could reconcile this contradiction?
I say: The strength of the pitcher is not in the external moisture. Water should be inside the pitcher. If there is no water inside but it is wet outside, it is no worth. This is why, if the talk concerns a person, it is not important what is his external life. It is the moisture of his pitcher. When you lift it, you realize that it is light, there is no matter in it. Would you keep at home a pitcher that is out of water? Therefore, the pitcher should be solid and to contain water in it. You complain that you are short of something. — Your pitcher is empty. — What shall I do? I have no servant who to fill in it. — You will become a servant of yourself and fill it in alone. — My legs do not hold me. — You will practice them to hold you. — I am disabled person. — Nothing, you will go to the spring with your crutches and you will fill your pitcher yourself. After that you will through out the crutches and you will bring back cheerful at home.
So, a person could not set free of his difficulties until he does not go to the God. You walk with crutches – they are the difficulties. You have misunderstandings, contradictions – these are the crutches. When you have come back from the spring all the contradictions will disappear. There you will have acquisitions, which nobody could deprive you. You will say that it is a temporary acquisition, a temporary proficiency. Proficiency that has been lost is a temporary condition. It is not a real acquisition. The reality implies going to the God where you had solved forever one of the most important issues. — This is not clear for us, we need more explanation. — No matter how long you were explained, it will remain misunderstood. Here is one clarification. You have got a candle made of whale fat. It is worth, if it is lit. Therefore, if your candle does not burn and you cannot light your way with it, what sense make it that the candle is made of whale fat? The fact that the candlestick is golden, that it is a souvenir of your grandmother and grandfather, it does not matter. The candle should light. If there is no light in the dark night that to lead you, what will you do?
Somebody is said that he does not speak properly. What is the speech? — Light. If the speech does not set free the person of his hardships, like the burning candle sets him free from the darkness that means there is a noise. Not every body can speak but every body can make a noise. Therefore, a speech that does not set free the person from hardships and difficulties is a noise. If you put your hand on the tender knee and cannot draw out the pain, it is not a magic one; it has no power in it. However, if it could draw out the pain, it is a magic hand. People having such hand are said to be doctors. If you have a headache, it is sufficient such a doctor to touch the sore spot and you will recover your health. Not only the hand should cure but the prayer should do it as well. Any pain should be drawn out too by one-two prayers. Not a few of you have the reputation of religious ones, you have listened to lectures, you have read the Gospel, but when an examination comes to you, you cannot pass it. The examination could be large or little one, but in both cases you will fail.
Imagine that you are visiting a friend of yours and you expect to have a good reception of him. It happens that he cannot give you a reception and treat as good as you expect. You return home unsatisfied and whole day long you are grumbling why you have gone to your friend to waste your time. What do you gain from this grumbling? You are saying for your friend that he lacks strength of character, cold-hearted and cannot serve the God. You, who in the certain case, are grumbling, do you serve the God? You are free, you could grumble as much as you want, but your friend is free to treat you or not. From where do you know he could be very busy?
A thief came to a banker and told him: I am a thief but I believe in God. I want you to give me 250 napoleons. — You want much, furthermore, you have not worked anything. — If you do not give me voluntarily them, I have a method by which I could take them. — There is order and law in the country. I am going to call the policeman to arrest you. — I can arrest you before you could arrest me. Before you have rung the bell, you will enter the prison. Before the banker has touched the bell, the thief has lifted a stick, aimed a blow with it in the air and lulled the banker to sleep. After that he wrote him a note:Second time, when a learnt thief comes to you, give him as much as he wants. The learnt thief is the human destiny. It comes to a person and says: You will give me such and such amount. — Give it, and do not make an issue. Otherwise, the destiny will come again, it will aim a blow with the stick in the air; it will lull you and it will take as much as it wants. Before you have coped with it, firstly it will cope with you.
In other words: What God wants of you, give it and do not think about it. Do not deny to the God. Do not refuse to accept the smallest thought coming from the God to you. It could be realized always. After all, do not refuse to fulfill one God’s thought. You say that you have no time. — You will find some time. Otherwise, you will find yourself in the position of that Bulgarian who went to dig his vineyard without praying before. He told his wife: I go to dig our vineyard. Tonight when I will be back I want to find a cooked hen. She answered: Say God willing, if all goes well. — There is no need to chatter to me “God willing, if all goes well or not” I am going to the vineyard now and when I will be back in the evening, I want to find a well-cooked dinner. He has left for the vineyard but he was met by Turks1 that caught him. They have taken him round to show them the way. He has come back home late, clattered the front door and said: God willing, if all goes well, wife, open the door.
There is nobody of you that was not taken round by the Turkish “deli-bashi”2. “Deli-bashi” are discontent, suspicion, failure and hardship in the life. The rich as well the poor pass through them. Only some people relate stories about hardship and the other felt shame to tell about them and do not tell anything. The poor usually tell about their misfortune, and the rich abstain from telling about them. Person should execute the God’s will for coping with his misfortune. His power is in the execution of God’s will. This should happen voluntarily. It means that the man struggled for the real life. Somebody has not executed the God’s will, or he has not lived well; we have no right to deprecate him. To live well, this is a great art. Many know to write and not many write correctly as per the requirements of the grammar. This means that all people live but few of them keep the laws and requirements of the life. For example, an acquaintance of mine masters several languages, but he dislikes working. One day he told me: Do you know what I have done? As I needed money, I wrote to three acquaintances of mine in America asking them to send me some amount. Let us see, how much they are going to send me. The three men answered that they had no money provided for him.
I am asking. Who of you have not written a letter to the God? And what kind of letters you have sent! However, some people obtain answer to their letters, but others do not. Whose is the mistake? — Yours. You will say that your letter is full of mistakes. You are writing to a letter to a banker asking money. Your letter is written without mistakes, with all the punctuation signs required, but you do not receive money. Other one writes a letter full of mistakes and receives money from the banker. — Why — The banker loves him, and he loves the banker too. It means that the letter, as well the words should have a deep internal content and a deep meaning. So, if somebody else reads this letter he will be content. Sometimes a person is happy with his deeds, but sometimes is unhappy. Since he is happy, the people around him are happy with him. You are doing something and you are unhappy. You are saying:- How could I do that? As many times as you remember that deed, you will feel ashamed and unhappy internally.
Contemporary people came to a stage of life when they should give the advantage of the Godlike part of themselves. If they do not do this, they will suffer and will be unhappy always. To be happy and satisfied by you means to be satisfied by the Godlike part in us, by the Divine voice which talks us. Who listens to this voice always will receive a 20-thousand leva cheque. A friend of ours told me about an event of his experience. He had a very bad cold. Doctors examined him, gave him prescriptions but the illness did not pass. One day he heard the quiet voice to tell him: Pray and you will be restored to health. He prayed all the day long zealously and he broke into perspiration so much during the night that he had to change clothes several times. He woke entirely healthy on the morning. Other his acquaintance fell gravely ill too. Also he heard something inside to give him advice how to restore to health. He carried out the advice but did not restore to health. – Why the first one has restored and the second could not? – The first followed the advice of the God’s voice without any doubt but the second had doubts.
People often complaint about the fact that they cannot realize their wishes. This happens both with worldly-minded and religious people. – Why do they not succeed in their life? — Because they look on the things in materialistic way. The religious person says: I do not dare to want something from the God I am not pure and holy. You have a human notion for purity. You are right that you should be pure and holy but the purity and sanctity are God’s properties. Firstly you will connect with Him and after that you will talk for purity. I would like to be a righteous man. — And the justice is God’s power. — I would like to love. — And the love is God’s power. The thing you call love is a shadow of the love. Love that appears and disappears constantly is not true one. It is as like today you are healthy, tomorrow – sick. The love excludes all diseases, all pains. It is not a shame that you are sick and suffering. Sometimes the sin causes diseases that are given for obtaining of experience. And the misunderstood disease leads to poverty. After restoring to health, the person will achieve wealth. Hence, you will learn both, by the health and the disease. If you do not learn, you are looking for the easy way in the life.
Speaking about the inner life, not a few think that they understand it. You say that the life should be good. What do you consider under “good life”? When the life is good there is not a doubt, lack of faith and dissatisfaction. Such person is satisfied even if the world is topsy turvy turned, he does not see any contradiction. I call such person “a person of happiness”. He is a righteous person. I liken the righteous people to the sun rays. — Are there such people on the earth? — There are, of course. If those who live on the Sun were not such people, no light will reach us. You say: What do Sun creatures think of us? — They do not think anything. When they see some unclean, muddy person, they put him in the water to be cleaned. They consider it is a privilege that they can clean and give someone a bath. That is why Christ says: „Larger is the joy on the sky for a sinner who repents himself than for 99 righteous ones.” — Why? — Because these 99 righteous ones think that they are pious and sinless. The sinner however knows that he has broken the justice law and repent of it. He has such experience that the righteous one has not. And when he was lead into temptation, he says: I tried this work once I am not going to join the dance for the second time. You will say that this is a contradiction, the sinner to be familiar with the justice, and the righteous one — not to be familiar with it. — No matter what do you think, the life cannot run without contradictions.
Contradictions come for approaching the man to the God. — Why am I getting ill? — For approaching the God. — Why do I become weaker? — For approaching the God. — Why people hold me in low esteem? — For approaching the God. There is nothing best than approaching the God. — I will lose my freedom.
— Not only you will not lose your freedom but also it will make your life worthwhile. — What means approaching the God? — It means to be present at a table fit for a king; if you are dead to come to life again; if you are ill to recover your health; if you are barefooted and tattered to become dressed in new clothes and shoes; if you are in chains, they will fall down from your hands and feet. Approaching the God means that all negative features in you, as hatred, envy, suspicion — all of them should disappear.
Speaking for the man’s approaching to the God you will say that this is not the right time now. — This is an old philosophy. What is the result of this philosophy? A poor poet had gone in the house of a banker with the intention of borrowing a certain amount of money. When he understood his intention, the banker told his servant: Told him, I am not at home. The poet heard his words and went home. Later, it happened that the banker needed the poet to write something for him; therefore he went to his house. After he had rung the bell, the poet’s servant went to open the door and asked the banker what he had wanted. — I am looking for the poet. At the same moment the poet called out behind his servant: Tell him that I am not at home. — How is that, I hear his voice. — I am here, but not for you. — answered the poet. And you are answered often: I am not here.— It means, I have no time for you. You must have faith both in yourself and in your fellow man. — We have faith. — Yes, your faith is for beginners. With that faith nothing could be reached. The faith of people today is beginner’s faith. You cannot move mountains with it. It is not that deep and absolute faith. The true faith is God’s power. Could you have doubts with such faith?
Someone comes to me asking to borrow him some money. I am putting him to a test. I am telling him. Squeeze your hand. — There is no need to squeeze my hand. You want to give me an examination, but I am not such a fool. You could say so to the others, but not to me. — Once, you do not believe, go away, I will not give you a brass. — But, you insult me. — What should it cost to you to bend your hand? You will have the thing you wanted. You had to do an attempt. If you bend your hand and open it, you would find something in it. — Then, tell us, to bend our hand, too. — I am not saying this to you. I told him this on purpose, because I knew that he did not bend his hand. For bending his hand, a man should know the properties of his thumb and also the properties of other fingers. Power is hidden in the fingers. There are certain conditions in which if you bend your hand something will come though it. The hand power is connected with the rationality in the man. A man could be given an examination as Abraham was examined to sacrifice his son to the God. As a matter of fact did God need that sacrifice? However, Abraham was ready to sacrifice his son to the God. Why and for what was it necessary that sacrifice, he did not consider. But, at the moment when he had to give the offering, he was told: Stop!
So, if our acquaintance had bent his hand, I should have thrashed my hand in my pocket and given him some money. I had done only one such attempt with one Bulgarian who had written to me from America: Many times you had said that there is Providence, but I have not had a case till now to check up whether your words are true. This is something imaginary. Tell me, from your point of view, how could I have my matters straightened out? I have a debt of 205 dollar but I need another 20 for clothes, for books. I am a foreigner; I cannot obtain that money from anywhere. Tell me, how to cope with this situation. I replied him: When you will obtain my letter, you will already have the money. If you have not the money, write to me to be aware of it. He wrote me next week: Yesterday was the happiest day for me. I have got money, do not worry for me. — How does it happen? — I know, how works the law. The man should have a child’s faith. I am not speaking about belief but about absolute faith, for absolute confidence.
A Divine Law exists that satisfies all needs of the life. Each Divine need was satisfied in time. However, first, the desire to complete the God’s Will should appear in the man. Today a man lives for himself only. And if his works do not happen as he wants he becomes discouraged. For realizing his wishes he should follow the God’s will. So, first, you will complete the God’s will, and later – yours.
Many people complaint against their poverty. A man is poor because he does not complete the great God’s law. You will say that so and so is rich but some else – poor. You encounter a loaded horse. Has it loaded itself alone? — No, somebody has loaded it. — The rich man represents such thing. And he was loaded by somebody, and the poor man was unloaded by somebody. As soon as the horse is unloaded, it becomes satisfied, but as soon as the rich man was unloaded he is unsatisfied. There is one load against which the people do not complaint. This is the wealth. If they were put four, even five loads, they do not complaint; there are pleased. They are strong; they carry the loads on their backs and say: We are ensured already.
Let us come to the internal understanding of the things. There is something more essential than the wealth. It is to become conscious of the presence of God’s Love in your soul. This is the most realistic, the most essential. At this Love all contradictions disappear. Strive to understand it correctly. Listen to the quiet voice in you. Prophet Elijah should endure severe trials till he hears the quiet voice of God in himself. He realizes that the God is not in the storm, in the fire but in the quiet voice. As soon as he come to know the God, Elijah ascended to the sky with a fire chariot. Each person will realize the life secrets after he passes through big sufferings and hears the quiet voice of God in himself.
The first order is:„Come to love your God with all your mind, with all your heart, with all your soul and all your power.” „And if God is on our side who will be against us?” You all should be bearers of God’s Love, to be models, to be successors of God’s possessions. As soon as the man does not come to the big spring, he could not understand the abundance of life.
Today I give you to think over 17th line, 22nd chapter, the Revelation. And the Spirit and the bride said: “Come! And who has heard, let him say come, and who is thirsty, let him come, and who wants let him have for nothing the water of Life”.
— The manifested love of the Spirit, the manifested wisdom pf the Spirit, the manifested truth of the Spirit brings the complete life of God, of the United, Eternal God of the life.
1 The story happened when Bulgarians were under Ottoman yoke.
2 ‘Deli-bashi” – undisciplined Ottoman soldiers in the end of XVIII century
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